it is a better sight of you to admire.
i hear songs on repeat. again and again until i get tired of it. until i start noticing the voice breaks, the pauses and funny breathings of the vocalists. i appreciate songs better when they are performed acoustically. i listen better when i can appreciate their vocals more than the noise that crowds the voice. most of the time noises drowns that important element. its annoying
like adele. there is no other way you could appreciate her vocals other than listening her performing it live, acoustically, unplugged whatsoever. and then theres mr west. john west. who talks a lot, but sweeps you off your feet the minute he starts singing. though at times i find it funny how his singing voice sounds a lot more flatter and all david beckham. but in a good way of course. sweeped, nevertheless.
most importantly, i play them on repeat.
and that only means one thing. im letting myself undergo a strict process. imagine having ulcer. you could either leave it as it is, or drink salt water and roll all over the house screaming, yelling, shrieking of pain. its a quick, terrible, hurtful, ferocious way of healing. but unfortunately, it works. the more you repeat the process ( drinking salt water ) , it eventually heals. quicker, than ever.
get me ?
so i walk around with this huge ulcer. paining me from within. not showing, not obvious. and u'd expect people to understand, but baby they don't. what people understand is what they choose to want to understand. and 80% of the time it isn't something you would prefer them to understand. its a choice they make for themselves. a choice that makes them, always at the advantage of things. quite naturally thats exactly expected of a human. naturally selfish in their ways. most of the time not realizing their actions. but do i hate them for it ?
no. of course not.
because quite unnaturally, i am the minority that understands the technicalities to how humans function. never expect that they will understand you do what you do. cause half of them dont even care. but they meddle anyway, just because. 85% will speculate, conclude, and feed their minds to whatever suits them. because its fun to speculate. and because its ego boosting to make sure that perception is right. it drives them altogether.
so drive along fellow humans. just don't get lost in it.
and when its time you get bored of pondering, maybe its best we all realize how there are far better things worth pondering about in this life. like finding our purpose, fixing ourselves, becoming better servants of the Almighty. like preparing ourselves before death comes knocking upon our doors. being better daughters,sons,husbands,wives,teachers whatsoever.
it is simply amazing to see how easy things fall place. they fall out, and they happen again.
2009, you've prepared me well for this.
for the record, i have never been happier being able to read, understand things much more better now. there is really, nothing i intend to do to fix the situation. not sure if anything needs fixing at all.
its a perfect setting, alhamdulillah.
and in between all these happenings, you can find me giddying my way in and out of things. because i'm finally content and happy with the things i have.
smile, and be happy throughout life. because it's only worth living if you live it right.
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