so i was back in mlys, for about a week plus, to be with my family. it felt like a fly by. there were days where i felt surreal, days where i found myself just retreating. days that ill never get back. well, all days that has gone can never be given back anyway.
driving back at home can either be stressful or calming. depending on the situation of the traffic. when its peak hour, you'll find cars sardined to each other on a 3 lane highway, gapped by probably just about one human in between each cars. thats nothing new, of course.
off peak, you'll get the highway to yourself, most of the times. of course, jerk assed drivers with high stupidity and short term thinking would be expected to be tail-gating behind the back of your car every now and then when you're in the fast lane, but other than that, the highway is yours. its straight, it gets boring sometimes.
you know what sucks about radio stations nowadays? they overplay songs. i always have this one song stuck in my head because of that. not that i like them, but because i'm the kind of person you'd expect to be in the car most of the time, running errands, picking up, dropping off, etc, sometimes hearing the same song over and over again for about 7 times in one day just kills the quality of appreciation we listeners have for it. thank God for different channel options, but more often than not, one station will just 'happen to be' playing the same song the other station is playing. and the suffocation repeats itself.
but of course, none of these you'll get if you switch from Hitz.fm to say, IKIM.fm , ahem.
i no longer put the radio on when im driving alone. it stresses me out. i switch it off, and i concentrate on the journey. i start listening to my inner self. i learned to be comfortable with the silence while driving. i reflected, i made important life decisions, i remembered, i let go. many things went through my mind in that one sitting. i was driving from ampang - setia alam, on duke highway, which, was much to my liking, a very straight road with lots of tolls. thank God for smart tag, the road was clear, and i was feeling rather content with what i had to deal with.
our thinking reflects who we are. at that point of time, i had to adjust a lot of unjustified reasonings i felt with my surroundings, trying to understand others' situations, and my expectations of them, vice versa. its never easy doing that, but its always a good thing to at least start somewhere.
flipping sides never sounds good to the ears, but at times, its acceptable, and sometimes, its necessary. turning a new leaf, re-directing, moving on, are the worlds best combo when it comes to self realization. why worry about people when the one dealing with things is you, yourself. why doubt when you know your own strength, why bother when most of them don't care.
so we cross things off the list, we erase, we write a new mission. and everyday is supposed to be like that. given the ability, given the choice, given the freedom, but we abuse them by not utilizing them to their fullest. and whats easiest to do - blame other people.
but of course, things like these shouldn't only be done during long drives, during times where radio stations fails us, or during moments where we feel frustrated with something not going the way we want them too.
it should be done everyday.
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