ever get days where you get so tired but cant put yourself to sleep ? they say its not insomnia if you dont want to sleep, but believe me, i force myself to sleep for the past 3 days and it isn't great at all. i end up tossing and turning, and finally, we got the heat back here. all of a sudden summer finally found its way after weeks of confusion.
old letters squeezed my heart, things said and done can never be taken back, but knowing i made my way this far definitely made me feel stronger. at one point, i never thought i could. but i did. and sometimes its things like these that pushes me forward.
we cant live in the past but we can learn from it. mistakes were made to teach us what we need and what we dont, in life.
many many things happened along the way, things i collected, held close and let go, held close and kept my grip. i realize ive been selective of the things i want to know and the things i dont. the things i know is worth the hurt, and things that aren't.
being selective has its days. some days i call myself ignorant, some, i call smart.
because in between the kilometres, i find myself selective of what i want to feel. shut off the ache, shut off the pain, and focused on the heart. that kept me going.
selective - is the word of the year.
wallahualam
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